Twenty Years Ago

Author's notes: I'd like to thank all my betas for helping me with this. The story took a long time for me to write and could probably use more beta'ing. But, I'm happy with it and hope you are too. I'd like to thank Becky, Sugar Babe, Diana and most especially, Candy Apple for helping me with this. If I didn't take your advice, it isn't your fault. :-) It's my own stubborness.

As he woke up with a groan, all Duncan could think of was Hell, I can't believe I'm back! Above his eyes was the ceiling of his Seacouver Loft. God! It's been so long since I've been here. When he'd walked into the building, it seemed like he was only here, just yesterday. Lying back, with his eyes open, he wondered just what was inside him that needed to be back here. He should have already sold the loft or rented it out, or something. Turning over with a small groan, he slid off the bed, and carelessly nude, walked over to the window of the loft. Looking at the silent street outside, he reflected on what had been happening to him in the last two years.

Nearly collapsing against the window, Duncan's mind was filled with the memories of all the lost chances, the hurt of past actions and the destruction of himself. He'd had so much and because of pure stupidity lost all of it. Surprisingly, destroying Richie hadn't been the final straw. Accepting Ahriman as part of himself hadn't done it, either. What had, and it still shocked him now as much as it did when he'd realized, was the destruction of the greatest friendship that he'd ever had. And, as he reviewed his emotions, possibly more than friendship had been lost without his knowing.

Methos, why the hell didn't I ever tell you what you meant to me? I should have known it was love I was feeling. Nothing less could have pulled me through those trying times with my head still intact Reflecting on his life, with his last actions toward Methos, he'd known that not only their friendship, but the budding love they were developing for each other was at an end. Suddenly, everything hit him at once. Duncan couldn't stop himself as he closed his eyes and let the hurt, pain, and terror of loneliness sweep through him. Suppressing the emotional memories that was becoming a daily part of his everyday being, he opened his eyes and pulled himself together to get dressed for his daily run.

In sweatpants and T-shirt, he decided he needed to lose himself in the daily regimen of physical activity, which is all that had saved him in the last two years from challenging the nearest immortal and committing suicide by losing his head. He started running, heading down tenth street, in which many others would be out running or jogging at this time of day, since it was usually quiet, because of it's wide, straight and long street. Pushing himself to the limit, he did ten miles that day, hardly feeling a thing.

Finally ending up back at the loft, as he entered his home, he paused to look around and saw that all the things he'd brought with him from Paris to the States was still in boxes. He'd been back in Seacouver for three days and had not started to unpack. That was highly unusual for him. If anything, it was more like what Methos would do. Just thinking of that was enough to bring back the depression that he'd held back since that morning and which seemed to be his only mood these days for the last two years.

"Well, Duncan, you may just have your chance. I've just killed a friend of yours, one Professor Tellille. It was surprisingly easy. No trouble at all, if I do say so myself. And while I was in the process of taking his head, it occurred to me that it would be much to my advantage to have something else at my disposal. Want to guess what it is? Or should I say, who it is. Can't guess? I have before me, his adopted son, or as you know, your godson. Now, since all kidnappers usually want something, I guess I need to be typical and give you my demands and all you half to do is give me a generic yes. Now, isn't that simple? Anyway, as I guess you realize, if you don't give me your head, I'll kill him. I think that's simple enough in plain English. You can find me in Cascade. I'm sure you'll be staying at your old residence, so I'll know when you get here. I'll contact you then." Abruptly, he hung up the phone.

"Damn!! Why does this always happen to me?" Already in agony with his recent past with Methos, he didn't need older, painful, memories, fucking him up either. After what had happened in Cascade years ago, it was the last place he wanted to be. Unfortunately, it looked like he didn't have a choice about returning. Being the kind of person he was, running away from an old friend wasn't possible. Gavin had been a close friend and one who'd always been able to cheer him up when he'd needed it. Even though just the thought of taking a head was causing him mental pain, it wouldn't stop him from taking Hammond's head. But, as he thought about the city and all the people he'd cared about, his mind wandered to the one place that was forbidden to him. Unconsciously, he softly muttered, "Jim!"

With a joyful smile, he rummaged through the fridge with enthusiasm. Finding the fixings for a salad, he got out the homemade vinaigrette and sat down to eat. He'd had a long day at the University, with the two classes he'd picked up unexpectedly because of death of one of the faculty members three days ago. He still couldn't believe that Professor Tallille had been killed like that. Although, he'd never really known the Professor that well, he was surprised that he'd died at all being as popular as he was. Especially, the way he'd been killed. He nearly passed out when he first saw the crime scene. Death alone was gruesome enough. He didn't need to see death by beheading. It was truly a first since he'd worked with Jim. The only thing that kept him from passing out was his experience at seeing various forms of death in the last three years.

Getting a beer, he went over to the couch. Leaning back, Blair thought about the Professor's death. Always, he'd seen Jim push with everything he had to solve a case. Most of the times, he was almost fanatical about it. That was what was weird about this one. Jim was hardly trying to solve it. You'd think, with as unusual a death as this was, not counting the fact that he'd been a Professor at the same university his partner taught at, he'd be going all out to try solving it. But to his surprise, as well as everyone else's at the precinct, especially Simon's, for the first time, Jim was actually demanding to be allowed to keep his vacation, and to not be primary in this investigation.

I've never seen Jim act like this in all the time I've known him. Not only does he not postpone the vacation on his own, insisting it's the perfect time to go camping, but he wants to invite Stephen as well. He said it's the perfect time to start mending fences with his brother. It's totally unlike Jim. Granted, with spring vacation before him, he had a week off with no duties or responsibilities which had taken a lot of extra work to manage. He'd done everything he could to prepare his week ahead of time. Already having graded his own midterms, he'd had the foresight to give it two weeks ago, instead of this week, so his vacation time would be free. Jim had planned ahead as well, trying to make sure that nothing would come up to interfere. But this was different. Extremely different.

Brooding over the personality change in Jim, he wondered why he felt as he did. He should be feeling all broken up, demanding that Jim go all out for his friend, but it was like his mind kept eluding the emotions that he should be feeling. Rage, hatred for a casual friend's loss, obsession to solve the murder, sorrow for seeing an untimely death and whatever else he'd usually be feeling. It was strange that he felt glad he wasn't going to be involved. And he had no clue why he felt that way.

He'd always wondered if his and Jim's moods were based on what the other was feeling. Since he'd met Jim, he'd tried to find out all he could about the Sentinel/Guide bond. Unfortunately, there was little information in written form that he could find. So ever since they'd become friends, it was like he came up with new ideas, new theories off the seat of his pants. But lately, he had to wonder if he was actually inventing all these ideas. After all, he was a shaman, Shaman of the Great City to be exact, as well as Jim's Guide. Maybe there was a spiritual world where some god sent him all the information he needed and depending on when it was needed, gave him enough of an unconscious clue to help guide his sentinel effectively.

The really weird thing that he'd noticed in the last year they'd been together was that he always seemed to know when Jim was upset, angry, frustrated, calm, happy, and whatever other mood Jim was in. But the astonishing thing to him was that he always seemed to know just what to do to calm him when he was about to go postal, whether from anger, stress, frustration or obsession. It was like he could snap his fingers and Jim would do exactly what he told him. Oh, Jim might blow a lot of hot air or complain that meditation was a bunch of hoohicckey or that alternative medicine was not the way to go, but in the end, he always ended up doing what he said. And if he thought Jim needed a vacation to keep from getting stressed, he was always right. It was strange that he seemed to know, unconsciously, more about Jim than Jim did himself. He'd always thought it one way though. Now, he had to wonder if maybe it was a two-way street. If he felt what Jim was feeling, maybe Jim was able to feel his guide, at least in his subconscious mind and know exactly what he had to do to protect his guide, especially from himself.

But with this whole case, there was no earthly reason for the way that they were both acting. The only thing he knew was that he seemed to feel somewhat similar to what Jim evidently was feeling, and he didn't know why it didn't bother him more than it did. And that's probably why all of Major Crimes is walking on pins and needles around us. This vacation that Jim insisted on taking come hell or high water may just be something that he needs. And being his guide, I can't get upset or angry because I have to do what's best for my sentinel.

Maybe that's what I was talking about, when I told Jim that it had come to a point where Jim needed to get away from work for a while. Hell, Simon and I have been trying to tell him that for weeks, and it was only Simon, forcing Jim to take the time off, that he accepted it in anyway. I sure as hell got plenty of argument from him when that happened. Now, all of a sudden, he's gung ho to go ahead and do it. Maybe he'd just been so overworked with his job, that he knew he had to slow down. But finding out from him if that were true was like pulling teeth from a baby. Jim wasn't saying anything except to insist on the vacation and with this weird personality I've had since Tellille's death, I'm not arguing or going against it. And more to point, somehow, I feel I don't have to. And it's obvious that only with this strange, new case, that Jim must have reached the point where he figures that Major Crimes can solve the case on their own.

He'd never forgotten when he'd first met Jim. In the little, dinky hospital room, all he could think when he walked in to see what appeared to be his new sentinel research subject, was that he'd found him. He'd found the ONE! Growing up, he'd always felt that something was missing. When he'd reached the age of physical maturity he'd known what it was he'd been missing. It was a person to love, that was entirely, completely, wholeheartedly, HIS! Somehow, he'd always known that he'd only have one chance at love. And so, he started to hunt for it, seeking for that missing part of his soul in his vast travels with his wandering mom. And he never found it. Hunting and hunting, he looked and never found what he'd been looking for. He could have just settled for marrying one of his attractive friends that he seemed to make with no effort at all, but he couldn't. He didn't know why, but he kept feeling as if he'd be betraying his love. So, he played the field, having sex where he may because there was no way in hell that he'd be able to go celibate. He had too large of sex drive to be able to do that.

As the years passed by, while he didn't give up looking, he quit actively seeking for love. He figured that if it was meant to be, it would happen. The only thing was that he hadn't expected it to happen over a period of a heartbeat, so suddenly that hitting him over the head with a hammer would have been kinder. He most certainly didn't expect it to be a man that he fell head over heels in love with at first sight, when he'd never been attracted to males in the slightest. And he most definitely hadn't realized that his love wouldn't be returned. It would have hurt a lot more, except for one fact. He'd loved Jim all these years they'd been apart. They hadn't had sex or seen each other everyday, or been best friends. But he'd survived. Living without Jim in his bed, he could do, but living without Jim in his life, well, he wouldn't last long. Survival takes on a whole new meaning when you belong to someone else. Life isn't worth living unless you have someone to love and everything you do, you run it through your head first by asking, is it something my love would like? So, he lived with it. He could have been happier, but he also knew that without Jim in his life, it would be a lot worse.

Grinning himself, Jim went and got a beer. Coming over to the couch, he leaned against it and said, "Well, Chief, do you have everything packed? It was all I could do to keep Simon from giving me that case. He kept insisting that as strange as it was, I was the only detective who was strange enough as well to have a chance solving it. Do you know how hard it is to tell your Captain to go to hell in a polite way? I know one thing, dealing with Simon when he insists on getting his way isn't the easiest thing in the world!! He threw a fit. It was the first time I've actually seen Simon with a red, furious face. It was funny in a way. I don't think he ever imagined that I'd do it. This was the first time that I actually told him I was taking my vacation, come hell or high water." With the smile in his eyes, you could actually see the devil inside him. Jim was evidently enjoying himself very much.

"You think I don't know that, Chief? Things always happen to me when I'm going on vacation and I'm tired of it. You only have this week to relax and I put in for my vacation four months ago. Granted, it was only because you and Simon insisted on it, but we did it anyway. We'll never get another chance like this. Simon can put other detectives on it. For once, it's not going to be me." Jim gave him a quick dark look after he'd said that, "I'm sorry, Chief, but I can't get involved in this case." Looking down, Jim quietly revealed, "This has too many memories associated with it. I can't go into detail, but I'm the last person who would do a good job in this investigation. I've heard about others like them, and they were never solved. They're also usually a one off case. I doubt there will be anymore murders. And if there is, it will only be the people that are involved with it. Innocent bystanders won't be harmed."

"I know, Chief. Telling me that won't do any good, though. I can't do it, Chief! For once, can you just trust me? Don't ask questions that I can't answer. Yes, I could probably solve the case, but I also know that it won't stop the beheadings. I promised someone that I'd never reveal what I know, and Chief, you know I keep my promises. All interfering with this case would do would be to put the police officer in danger because of things they don't know that would kill them in a heartbeat."

Getting up, Jim walked over to the balcony with a foreboding look on his face. Following, I stood beside him as he leaned against the railing. It almost appeared as if he were zoning, yet I knew he wasn't. In all the time I'd known him, Jim had never told me anything other than the truth. For Jim not to be able to tell me anything must mean that it involved something that Jim wanted to stay out of. And it didn't escape me that he'd used the word can't multiple times in his words. Jim knew what was going on and evidently he was forbidden to act on it. So, with the obvious excuse of his vacation handy, he had the perfect way to escape from Major Crimes while they tried to solve it. And even when he returned, another investigator would have charge of it, with the immediacy of solving having let up, somewhat. The brilliance of the situation was apparent, as well as the fact the Jim knew damn well that I'd agree to anything he asked of me. I don't think I've ever denied him once, and it didn't look like this would be the first time either.

Turning my head, the view of the afternoon sun filled my eyes with beauty. I loved Jim. It was as simple and straightforward as that. If Jim said he couldn't get involved than he couldn't. And to keep him happy, my emotions were suppressing all of my own feelings about the matter. If it came down to solving the case or keeping Jim happy, keeping Jim happy wins hands down. The professor wasn't as important as Jim was to me. In a way, it hurt to admit that to himself, to know that Jim could kill a million people and I'd still be right there alongside there with him. But the worst thing of all is that I don't regret it.

The shock of the revelations to himself, kept him silent as well as Jim, as they stood there together feeling the heat and the afternoon sun in their faces. Turning to face him, Jim, his emotions carefully hidden from him asked, "Chief, I hope you're ready, because I'd really like to get on the road today. I know Stephen said he'd be ready, but I know my brother. He'll be on time for his work and school, but come game practice or ball games, or camping and he never knows what to do. It's like he loses his mind when he's excited. For as smart a man as he is, he becomes absolutely brainless when its recreational to him. We'll probably have to help him tie his shoelaces, let alone making sure he has his sleeping bag with him."

"Camping will do that, Chief! Come on, get your gear and I'll call Stephen and tell him we're almost ready to leave." Getting up, he went to the phone to call Stephen. A few brief words later, Jim turned around and found Blair had all their luggage and gear ready by the door. It took two trips to haul their luggage down to the van Jim had rented for the week. After Jim had checked all the windows to make sure they were secure, he locked up and returned to the van."

On their way over to Stephen's house, they made fun of each other, joking around, like they normally do when they're teasing one another, so that by the time they did get to Stephen's they were both relaxed enough not be anxious like they had been after the revealing conversation they'd just had. When they reached Stephen's house, they went up to knock at his door. Opening it with a loud thud, and a yell, "Dammit, where the hell is my swimsuit?", Stephen greeted them with a disgruntled look. Giving them a brief greeting, "Jim, Blair, I seem to have a problem." He turned around, went back inside and started hunting for whatever it was he was looking for. He and Jim just looked at each other, shrugged their shoulder, and waded through the complete absentmindedness of Stephen's brain. Jim had told him that Stephen didn't have much a brain for physical pleasures, and with the site that greeted us, it sure enough seemed like he had trouble with camping for sure. It was funny, them going through his camping gear making sure he had everything from sun block, to, sure enough, his tent, which he had forgotten. But, as embarrassing as it was for Stephen, it did break the ice, Jim seeing Stephen in a way that he'd only seen in his childhood. By the time they were on their way to the campground, Jim was relaxed enough to reminencse with Stephen about past memories. Blair made sure it continued in that relaxing vein, by making sure Stephen was included in the conversation by teasing him about his narrow airheadedness concerning what was supposed to be relaxing hobbies and the joking with him about people they found out they knew in common. Finally, when they reached their site, the three of them were somehow perfectly at ease with each other and at first appearances, seemed to be old friends.

Duncan was in the outskirts of Cascade when he pulled over. His breathing was going a mile a minute. He was a nervous wreck after the drive from Seacouver. In a normal situations, there was no way in hell he would have been there if it hadn't have been for the death of his old friend. He'd been able to get out of killing for over a year now. He carried his sword, but it was only as a last resort. He wasn't as gung ho as he used to be. He wasn't the same warrior that he'd been raised as. Gazing at the scenic view of the city of Cascade in front him, Duncan suddenly realized who he was more like now. Methos! Here Methos had been trying to constantly teach him that he needed to back away from some battles. That if he had to run away or leave than he needed to do it. It was a terrible shame that now that their friendship was broken, he'd finally learned the survival mechanism that Methos had always been attempting to teach him. He'd also learned that sometimes you really need help and that one couldn't do it all by themselves. That sometimes, you needed others to help you survive. He'd always had a problem letting others help him. He'd always had to be the protector.

Starting the car up again, he drove into the city. Knowing the suburbs and central downtown by heart, it didn't take him anytime at all to find his old home. Stepping out, he leaned against the car and stared at two storied, beautiful white house with trellis' along the edge and ivy and rose vines edging it. It looked like the upkeep of the house over the last twenty years that he'd paid for was complete and thorough. It appeared as if it was ready to move into. Getting his suitcase out, he went and opened the door. Stepping through the foyer, flashbacks from the past hit him with a shocking strength. Memories flooded his mind with joy, pain, sorrow, hatred, and sadness. All of those emotions, he'd experienced at one time or another in this house.

Holding himself together by a thin thread, Duncan went to his old bedroom. Hesitating outside the door, he almost went to one of the guests' bedrooms. But with his typical Macleod stubbornness, he had to stick with this one. Although the memories had ended with hatred, there were a lot of wonderful ones as well. Throwing himself on the bed, he wondered just why in the hell he was there. If Douglas wanted revenge, he could just as easily found it where he lived. Although they were enemies now, there was one thing he could count on with him. The fight would be fair. The only reason he took a hostage was to give a reason to fight, even if their past wasn't enough anyway. Although that didn't mean that he wouldn't kill Rafe.

He still remembered the kid. Rafe hadn't been that old when he'd last seen him. He had been seven or eight at the most. He couldn't even imagine what he'd grown up like. And Douglas and Gavin were the only two immortals who knew about his five years of life in Cascade. It seemed ironic that he was facing this just after he'd suffered tremendous loss. The past always leaped up and bit you when you least expected it.

Throwing the phone down, for once Duncan cut loose and screamed, "Damn him to hell and back!" Invectives were pouring out of his mouth in Gaelic, English, French, Russian, Japanese, and whatever other language he happened to know. Anger so strong was coming off of him in waves. He knew that if he didn't do something, he'd lose it. The last thing he wanted was for Douglas to know he was getting to him. Running to his bedroom, he pulled his sweat clothes out. A run was the only thing that might help. Otherwise, he'd probably do something he'd regret.

"I know what you mean." Coming over to them after preparing the fish for cooking, Jim commented with, "I was really starting to become extremely paranoid. I couldn't even do my job without jumping at every little thing. We'd had one hard case after another. It seemed like it would never let up. Even Sandburg was starting to show his rare temper. Normally, he's the one putting me and everyone else in Major Crimes back together. There's nothing like his enthusiasm and quirky sense of humor to lighten the load of the detectives."

Laughing, "Well, I see that it's evidently worked out." Staring at both of them for a few minutes, he finally got up the courage to speak, "In truth, I'd wondered if maybe you two weren't lovers. I mean, even a lot of marriages don't last as long as you two've been together." Waiting for their anger, Stephen was obviously preparing himself for their outbursts. To his surprise, they did just the opposite. They laughed.

Blair reached out a hand and laid it on Stephen's arm. "You aren't. It's nothing that we haven't faced before anyway." Becoming fidgety after the serious nature of the conversation, especially considering how close it was to his private fantasies, Blair jumped up and told them, "Guys, I'm going to hot spring. I could use a bath about now. Anybody want to join me."

Reaching over to pop Jim in the head, "Very funny, Jim. I ought to take you up on that. Thanks for telling me that I smell. Like I really needed to know that too." Racing away, Blair gathered the few items he'd need for his bath. He really needed a soak. He didn't like taking one with Jim and Stephen. Unfortunately, that was the perfect way to display to Jim the constant boner he had around him. He didn't notice the silence that seemed to gather around the two men after he left.

After a few moments of silence, Jim responded with, "I'm on inactive status too. I've never really been a full time watcher. When I joined the military, I never had time to devote myself to the job. Then, when I got out, I was tired of the constantly moving. There was no way I would've stayed active. Instead, I'm the contact the Watcher's go through when a body appears here in Cascade. I try to make sure the case doesn't get solved if it's found, otherwise, I have to make sure the bodies will never be found. I've only had to do that twice since I returned to Cascade. This city isn't the most active place for immortals. In fact, I insisted on this vacation because a head was taken three days ago. My captain knows me well enough that there is no way that I could get away with hiding information, lying about the truth and delaying the investigation. Unfortunately, in this case, it's a disadvantage when you're considered the best cop in the unit."

Shocked that his brother knew, it was a few moments before he quietly said, "I couldn't. You know what it would have meant. I couldn't let anything happen to him because of me. I wasn't going to be the one responsible for him losing his head. He wasn't ready for that challenge. It would have been over before it had a chance to start. It was easier to just leave."

"I know, Stephen. You think it still doesn't kill me, knowing I was responsible for hurting him like that. I know he didn't deserve it, but I didn't have a choice." It was extremely rare for him, but the emotional memories had tears pouring down his face. Jim sobbed his hurt, anger and pain, for once letting their past conflicts go, gaining comfort from his brother. Reaching over, Stephen gathered his brother in his arms. He continued to hold Jim as his tears poured out of him. It didn't take but a few moments for Stephen to realize that there would have been nobody he could have confided in.

A few seconds later, Blair bounced into the campsite. His hair was wet as limp noodles, and he looked like a wet poodle. The wide grin on his face, filled with his irrepressible humor, made his appearance incongruous. As one, both Jim and Stephen burst out laughing. Perplexed, not knowing what he looked like, he demanded "What?!" All that confusing, wide-eyed puppy dog look, and the question that came with it did was make them laugh even harder.

Anxiously waiting for another phone call, Duncan spent his time refamiliarizing himself with the city of Cascade. There had been a lot of changes in the last twenty years. He had called to find out when Gavin's funeral was. Attending, he couldn't help but notice the absence of Gavin's adopted son. He'd have liked seeing him again after all this time. He'd always liked Rafe's mother. Gavin couldn't have done better than marrying her.

He did see that there was a couple of men in long coats, not quite trench coats, who were looking at him strangely. He wondered who they were, but since he couldn't ask without revealing part of the truth or be able to do anything about it, he wasn't worrying about it. Of course, he probably would have asked about the people there. Twenty years was a long time and people can change in unrecognizable ways in that amount of time.

Laughter coming out of the phone, he calmly said, "Well Macleod, it's nice to see you off your step. After all, I want to have the advantage. I could hardly do that, if I didn't have something hanging over your head. But since you so nicely demanded, I'll tell you what I'll do. A protg of mine will fight you first. You win, and I'll meet you in a few days. This is as good a time as any to test my student. If he can defeat you, so much the better."

A smile in his voice, he was answered, "We'll see," He hung up after that. Duncan was still clenching the phone minutes later. His anger had frozen him up. When he finally loosened up enough to make his way to the meet, his hot temper had forged into a calm, ice cold anger. He was too good not to be able to control his temper in battle. That didn't mean that Douglas' student wouldn't pay. His past experiences didn't mean he still couldn't have his revenge. It just meant he'd have to survive. No matter what that took.

Reaching the mill, with his sword in hand, he slowly, cautiously made his way inside. He immediately felt his challenge's presence. A second later, a dark red headed, olive complexioned, young man came in. The look on his face told him that this Gary thought he'd win with no problem. Evidently, his teacher wanted to get rid of him. Nothing like student/teacher loyalty, he thought to himself.

With that standard introduction, the fight was on. It was no surprise that it only took a few minutes to win. As angry as he was, he didn't hesitate to take his head. Duncan had by that point had enough, and if this upstart thought he could get by on his arrogance, then too bad for him. In a matter of moments, the head of his opponent was on the floor. The quickening was weak, as only a new immortal's would be, taking only a few moments to absorb. It didn't take him long to recover. He thought about hiding the body, but, they were in an out of the way place that was closed down. He thought it would be a few days at the least before somebody found the body. Wiping his blade off, he didn't realize that he was watched the entire time. As he left, he didn't see the two men calling on their cell phone. Nor did he see them lay something down on the body.

Soon after, when he was long gone, the place was swarming with cops. Brown was in charge, with Simon overseeing what looked like Brown's first major case. With Rafe and Jim on their vacation leaves, that left Brown as the only detective senior enough to be lead investigator on this case. Looking down at the body, Simon commented to Brown, "Damn, this is the second body we've had in week. What the hell is going on?"

"I hope not. The last thing we need is more inexplicable deaths. Forensics aren't even back with Tallille's death. And how are we going to explain to Rafe that his stepfather was killed? I don't have the first idea where to contact him or where he is. I'm glad that he isn't here, though. We don't need him constantly demanding us to investigate. But, I do wish we could reach him somehow. It's going to hurt him bad that he wasn't here for the funeral. He doesn't normally disappear without telling me where he can be contacted at. That's not like Rafe."

Glancing around, Simon didn't deign to answer. His gaze was fixed on what looked like a hotel deskpad. Reaching down with his gloves, he picked up it up. It was blank. A further look at it as he held it to the light, showed that there was an impression on it. Taking his pencil out of his pocket, he started to rub across it to get the impression. Staring at him was a name, Duncan Macleod and a number. Calling Brown over, he had him bag it for fingerprints. Taking the name and number, he dialed it.

Duncan was walking through his door as the phone rang. Picking it up, again thinking it was Joe, he answered "Duncan Macleod." Simon, on the other end, not wanting to give anything away, said wrong number. Shrugging it off, Duncan just hung up and went to clean his sword. He used a special substance that he'd found cleaned swords well enough that no evidence could ever be found on it. It dissolved blood so their was not a trace. Even though he wasn't connected to the body, he'd long ago learned the lesson that it was better to be safe than sorry.

"Well, lets hope we've got our murderer." While the scene was being bagged and categorized, Simon called to have the phone number traced. Moments later, he had the address. With Brown, and two patrolmen with him, he went to the house. Going up the steps, they rang. Hearing the door unlock, they watched as a tall, very physical man with black hair and dark, olive skin answered. Looking at them in surprise, he queried, "May I help you?"

Holding up their badges, they told him that he was wanted for questioning on the murder of one Gary Logan. Shocked, he let himself be hauled off to the precinct. It wasn't an unusual occurrence, having to answer the police. What was surprising though, was how they'd connected him to his death. The only thing he could think of was that Douglas wanted him to experience the humiliation of arrest. That's not counting, getting him out of a sword fight he didn't think he could lose. He did wonder why an immortal would risk the public finding out about them like this.

Taking Macleod in for questioning, Simon sent Brown back to the house with a warrant in hopes of finding the murder weapon. Brown looked around the house, noticing that it was immaculate, as if this Macleod character had just moved in. A thorough search of the premises revealed a sword. As soon as he saw it, he knew he had their killer. On his way back to the precinct, he told Simon about the evidence over the phone. With that knowledge in hand, Simon used it to question Macleod.

Simon was really starting to get frustrated by now. Macleod's composure was something that he hadn't seen in a long time. It didn't take much to know that he'd seen the insides of a police station before. He'd already pulled up his rap sheet and was surprised at the number of murders that couldn't quite be pinpointed to him, but that he was most definitely involved in someway. Macleod had a file a mile long with the police. A lot of it was foreign information, too.

Seeing his sudden stillness, Blair noticed that Jim wasn't moving. He was staring, with shock on his face, at a tall, dark man. He wasn't the only one. The man had the same look on his face that Jim had. Turning to find out what was wrong, he saw something else. Stephen was staring at the man in astonishment, too. Quickly his concern for his partner flared. Asking in an attention getting tone, he said, "Jim!"

Duncan abruptly came back to his surroundings. All the anger, all the hatred that had been building up, not just in the past week, but over the years, all the painful memories surged through him. Not even taking the time to say anything, not caring about where he was, who he was with, he let fly. His fist landed hard on Jim's face. Strong enough, it knocked him on his ass, although it didn't take him out. Duncan silently started to move toward the doors, not caring that he'd just assaulted someone in the police department or that he could be arrested for it. Only one thing halted him. It was a cry of, "DUNCAN!"

Left in the squad room, Stephen looked around. He didn't know what he was going to say. He didn't have the answers. Blair was silent with astonishment, his face reflected what the rest of them felt. Simon, wanting answers, and realizing that he was the only one who knew anything, came over to him and asked, "Mr. Ellison, do you want to explain what we just saw?"

Wordless, Stephen didn't have the first idea of how to get himself out of this. He didn't know what was going to happen to his brother. He was left holding the bag and he hated it. Fuck it, they can just wait until Jim explains. I'm not going to get Jim in any deeper than he already is. He's already risking the entire organization. He was walking away, when Simon pulled him back with a firm grip on his arm. "Ellison, I've never seen Jim act like that. Now, you're going to tell me what is going on, or I'll hold you for suspicion of murder."

Simon just stared after him. Blair hadn't spoken a word. Seeing the rest of the room in silence, he suddenly shouted, "Everyone, get back to work! You'd better be busy in five minutes, or there'll be hell to pay!" He went back to his office. With the blinds already down, no one to see him, he leaned against the wall. Hearing the door opened, he watched as Blair came into the office with Brown. Immediately, he demanded answers, "Sandburg, do you know what the hell that was all about?"

Not having the first clue, Sandburg was silent for a moment. Still in shock himself, he didn't know what had just happened. He'd never in the almost three years he'd known Jim, ever seen him react like that. He didn't know what to tell Simon, except for, "Simon, I've never seen Jim act like that. Obviously, Stephen knew what's going on, but I don't. It's not something Jim's confided in me." Without realizing it, the hurt in his voice, was very apparent. Simon couldn't accuse him anymore, because it was as plain as day that he didn't know anything.

Going over to his desk, he fell into his chair, pulling out of a drawer, a flask of whisky he kept only for emergencies. Frankly, if this wasn't an emergency, then he didn't know what was. Offering his chairs to Brown and Sandburg, he told them, "Sandburg, Brown, do you want some of this whiskey? I only keep it for critical times. If this isn't as good excuse as any to drink than I don't know what is."

"Damn! And Jim obviously knows him well. From the way he looked, Jim doesn't hate him. It looked more like hurt. What is between them?" Muttering to himself, Blair was trying to work out his own emotions from what he'd witnessed. Unfortunately, as much as he wanted to sympathize with Jim, he'd rather know what was going on. He hated the fact that he didn't know something that must have occurred in Jim's past that was that serious enough to cause him major hurt. If he didn't find out the truth there was no way he could help Jim. And it looked like Jim really needed his Guide to be there.

Hearing this fantastical information, he at first thought Blair and Simon were joking. But remembering the situation, he knew that there was no way they'd be joking at a time like this. Absorbing the knowledge, all Brown could do was what he would have done without asking anyway. He told them that it was okay with him, and that he wouldn't tell anyone, but that he did wonder just what that had to do with this. He thought it was unlikely that they would here anything about that.

"It was an excellent vacation. And as for Stephen, I got along fine with him. He's actually a lot more outgoing than Jim is. And Jim, well it only took that first night before Jim and he were comfortable enough to just be brothers. By the time the vacation was over, we were all mellowed out. I didn't hear the first argument or recriminations about the past. But Simon, I know you noticed, but Stephen knew Duncan Macleod as well. Although, evidently not as well as Jim. Whatever happened in the past had to be before he left home. That has to be at least twenty years ago."

It took him a few minutes, but he finally found the files that Jim had downloaded off of the computer. It must have been a rush job, because he probably would have deleted it otherwise. Reading the first, it looked like an update sheet. The database said it came from was something called Watchers. The sheet was the physical facts of one, Joe Dawson. It said he was a resident of Seacouver, Washington. That he owned a bar called Joe's. It listed some facts, like how long he'd worked for the watchers, which was over thirty years, that he was fifty-four years old. Under his title, it said he was United States Divisional Head. It claimed that he alternated residences back and forth between Paris and Seacouver. But then, his eyes were caught down at the end of the data sheet. One line at the bottom said that his active assignment was one Duncan Macleod.

Pulling back in shock, Blair just stared at the sheet. Obviously, this Joe Dawson had something to do with Macleod but he had no idea what organization the Watchers were. A pad next to the computer had a phone number written on it. A glance confirmed that it was the same number as that of Joe's bar. It seemed as if Jim needed his phone number. He'd probably called from here.

At the top, it stated Current Placement and Status. Next to that it said Duncan Macleod. After a few moments of reading, he recognized what it was. It was a list of dates for the last year. It had one for each day, and next to them, a brief explanation of Duncan Macleod's whereabouts. Reading down the file, most of it concerned him at his residence in Paris. There was were a few meetings that seemed to be important.

Puzzled, the more Blair read, the more confused he got. When he got down to the end, he noticed something else. One, Macleod had evidently just returned to Seacouver from Paris. It was a permanent move, but he'd only been in his old residence three days, when he disappeared. His actions were recorded up to that point. Someone had made a specific notation that there was no trace of his disappearance. Then, two days later, another notation stated that he was in Cascade, that there was telling how long he'd remain there.

But the most telling thing of all, were two things. First, Macleod wasn't in Cascade when Professor Tallille was killed. Next, even more confusing, and looking at the time the notation was entered, it was just today, there was a statement that said a Gary Logan, student to Douglas Hampton, had challenged Macleod. It was uneven in skill, but Duncan won the challenge with no trouble. Someone had made a specific comment in it.

It said, "Duncan Macleod has apparently recovered from taking the head of his student. The insanity behind that evidently is over. While there is no indication that the recovery is assured, he at least carries his sword for the purpose it's intended for. It will not be long before Hampton will challenge Macleod personally. They are nearly equal in age and skill, so it's anyone's guess who will win. The Watchers have lost all trace with Hampton, and have no knowledge of his whereabouts. We continually search for him, but it seems that he has hidden all trace of his presence and holds Brian Rafe, Professor David Tallille's adopted son hostage for assurance of a challenge. Although Hampton normally fights fair, because of this change in procedure, we do not know if the challenge will be one on one, in a fair fight. Macleod waits for the call. Our reserve contacts within the police department of Cascade assures me that it can be covered up. Jim Ellison will be assigned to the case, with his activation temporary only duty. His brother, Stephen Ellison, has been reactivated to permanent active duty until further notice." It ended with that.

Blair didn't know what to make of this. As confused as this day had been, this was even stranger. Somehow, this Macleod had people monitoring his whereabouts and actions twenty four hours a day. He assumed that this Joe Dawson was the one in charge of Macleod's case, although from his title, he was probably more important than that. Although, why he owned and worked in his own bar, he didn't have the slightest clue. But what was even stranger, it looked as if Jim and his brother Stephen were a part of this Watcher organization.

Leaning back, trying to let all this new information sink in, he didn't know what to do. Did he tell Simon that it looked as if he had proof that Macleod killed Logan or did he wait to see what was going on first. It didn't matter what Jim had done, Blair knew that there was no way he was going to betray his best friend, and the man he loved more than life itself. Even if his own life was ruined in the process.

Deciding he'd be better off waiting to see what the night brought before he did anything, he got up to go to bed for awhile. He knew he'd need the sleep because he'd have to stay awake for at least twenty-four hours. As for this new knowledge, he wasn't going to do anything. He'd have confronted Jim with it first, anyway, before he'd get Jim into trouble by showing it to Simon.

Coming home, he'd made it there in a literal daze. The route had gone by before he'd known it. Hesitating before his home, he suddenly decided he needed physical exertion to help him forget. Rushing in, he quickly changed to his sweats again. He'd already done more running in the last week than he had in a long time. It looked as if he was going to do some more. He was gone for a considerable length of time.

Falling down into the middle of one of the couches, he leaned back and waited for Jim's explanation. Jim started pacing like he had done a few moments before he'd showed up. Then he stopped and turned and blurted out before he could change his mind, "Duncan, what I did twenty years ago, I didn't have a choice. I made the only decision I could at the time. You don't know how truly sorry I was and still am today for that matter."

Jumping up, Duncan was immediately shouting, "Dammit Jim, don't you know the hell I went through. One day, we were happy as a peacock, and the next you disappear off the face of the earth. Your brother didn't know where you were, your father hadn't the first clue since you'd been estranged since we met. I thought you were dead. But no, stupid me, I had to get investigators to search for you. And seven, and I mean SEVEN, months later, I find that you've joined the military. There was no goodbye, no dear John letter, no nothing. If I could have killed you at that time, I probably would have." Duncan's pain, sorrow, frustration and intense hurt all burst through his words.

An ominous feeling deep within him, Duncan knew he wasn't going to like what he was about to hear. Deciding that he'd better sit down before he passed out, he made himself as comfortable as he could. He was only going to be able to listen if he braced himself emotionally as best he could. There was no sense in embarrassing himself by not being able to deal with Jim's obvious revelations. He waited. The answers would be soon forthcoming.

Reaching into his shirt, he pulled something out. It was a thin chain, with a medallion hanging from it. Taking it off, he walked over and silently handed it to him. Duncan looked down at it. At first, it didn't connect in his mind. Then, looking at it, he knew exactly what it was. Looking up at Jim, astonishment was plain in his eyes. Not speaking, he questioned Jim with eyes. This couldn't be what he thought it was. It couldn't be.

"..It damn well wasn't the reason I fell in love with you!" When that bomb fell into their laps, Simon, Blair and Brown were as shocked as they could possibly be. They thought they'd been prepared for anything. But not that! Looking at each other, none of them had anything to say. The explanation was far beyond what any of them had expected. Not saying anything, they just listened.

Blair hurt so bad from that statement, it was a wonder he was okay. The fact that his Jim had been in love with a man before was totally beyond him. He'd always thought Jim was straight. Then, he realized that if Jim hadn't made a move for him in nearly three years, than he probably never would. Knowing Jim wasn't in love with him and never would be tore him apart. Feeling an anguish so strong, before he knew it, tears were falling out of his eyes. The pain was so bad he couldn't hold himself together.

Pulling himself together, he listened to the rest of the conversation. As badly as he hurt, he was still Jim's Guide. The only way he could help Jim was to know the truth. Even though his world crumbled down around him, he started handling it, because he knew Jim would need him, even if the only way he could ever be with him was as a friend. Brown and Simon in a similar state of shock and had their ears glued to the speakers. They all sat there and listened to the scene that unfolded before them.

"Falling in love with you goes against everything the Watchers are. It seriously jeopardizes the entire organization. I damn well wouldn't have fallen in love with you to get close. I didn't need to." As Jim said that, he collapsed against the couch, tears falling down from his eyes. My eyes had just as many tears, but I couldn't gather my thoughts to say anything. We sat there until the quiet of the room exaggerated our memories.

"DAMMIT, DUNCAN!! You're not listening. I fell in love with you from the first! I knew the truth from before we even met. Do you seriously think I would have left you because of that? I knew you couldn't tell me. I had hoped when our commitment had lasted long enough, that you'd have trusted me enough to tell me the truth, but I wasn't expecting it or even waiting for it. No one knows more then me why you couldn't tell anyone. It would be dangerous to tell me, although just living with you as your lover, I was involved. Sooner or later the game would have interfered with our relationship . And as for telling you, I couldn't tell you I already knew because that would have broken the very code that protected us. I was stuck between a rock and hard place. But that wasn't enough reason for me to leave you! I would have found a way to balance things If I could but circumstances made it impossible."

After that long explanation of telling me that he'd always been a Watcher, something confused me. I thought Watchers were recruited as adults, although I knew that they usually recruited those that accidently witnessed a Quickening. I'd never heard of children Watchers. If they had them, then Joe had some emplaning to do. "Jim, just how did you become a Watcher at that age? I thought they don't recruit until they're older."

"Yes, Duncan. Actually, he's been an active Watcher all his life. He only recently, about four years ago, retired to settle down with a job at the racetrack. Me, when I left you, there was no way I could ever accept another assignment, so I quit and was placed on reserve status. By keeping me on call I could handle things as they came up in Cascade, but not be forced to do all the traveling that's normally required. If something happened, I was in a position to help cover it up and make sure the public found nothing out. It was especially true when I joined the Cascade P.D. Watchers always need personnel in the police departments to help them, since the bodies always end up there. It's the perfect position to make sure nothing was revealed."

"Uh..Huh. Stephen and I were playing in the woods on the outskirts of Cascade when we saw a woman fight another man with swords only. Then, we watched as she won the challenge and took his head. The Quickening that following scared Stephen and I shitless. I distinctly remember that we thought aliens had come down to Earth to destroy us. We were immediately running for our lives. That's how scared we were. As we ran away, a man caught up with us and grasped our collars. Forcing us to stay where we were, we waited until the woman had left. Then, Raymond, the woman's Watcher, told us everything. Then he asked us if we wished to be a part of it. He said it wasn't required, but that it would help knowing the truth so we wouldn't have nightmares. He treated us like adults and gave us a choice of either knowing the full situation or to just try to forget and hoped it worked. Like most of the people in that situation, we chose to become Watchers. In fact, Duncan, a lot of Watcher's are recruited that way. Normally, adults don't believe children. If they witnessed a Quickening and told someone about it, adults tended to think they were just playing with them. If they even tell anyone at all. But, Stephen and I were old enough that someone might have believed us, especially if I'd been able to get someone to see the body while it was still there, before it could be buried."

"I know. It was kind of strange that we witnessed the first head she'd taken in over thirty years. Her reputation as a thief and her ability for getting herself out of challenges or trouble precedes her. It would take an angry man not to susceptible to her charms. I do know for a fact that her Watchers have had to be very good over the years to keep from being spotted."

The pain of the memories of Ahriman were tied up with memories of Richie and of course, Methos. It hurt to remember them. Especially their loss. Combining that with what he felt facing Jim again, had him nearly on his knees praying for relief. "Maybe, but that still doesn't explain why the hell you left me. God, I was so hurt. I hated you for a long time when you disappeared on me with no warning. It's a wonder I ever trusted enough to fall in love again."

"Duncan, for all it's worth now, I'm sorry. Again, I did the only thing I could do at the time. I never wanted to leave you or ever cause you pain. Leaving you was a last resort. It was either to leave you or kill myself. I thought leaving you would give you a chance to get over me, to find someone else to love. I loved you enough to give you that. I also cared for my life enough to respect myself."

Inside the van, Brown, Blair and Simon all heard movement inside, as if someone was pacing or moving energetically. As Blair listened, he knew that Jim wouldn't leave without a good reason. In all the time he'd known Jim, his honor and loyalty were his greatest assets. When he loved someone, there was nothing halfway with him. He gave everything. The only thing is that one had to listen closely because Jim would never tell you his troubles himself. He was very closemouthed about his emotions. He expected the people he cared for to know and that wasn't very realistic.

Damnit, Jim! Why didn't you tell me about Duncan? Don't you know that even if it killed me, I'd never betray you? God, I love you so much and I didn't even have a chance. Duncan Macleod, I hope you know you found gold when you met Jim. I don't have to hear his reasoning for leaving you to know that when he says he didn't have a choice, he didn't have a choice. But I can understand how you feel. If I'd had Jim's love and lost it when he left me, it would destroy me. The only difference between you and me, Macleod is that I wouldn't have survived.

As I'd listened to Jim, all I could feel was the need for an explanation. He had to know Why Jim did it. "Hell, I loved you, Jim. Do you know what it did to me to think that you suddenly woke up and realized that you no longer wanted to be with a man? I already had guilt enough because I seduced you. You were only sixteen! At my age, I should have known better!"

"Seduced me! What are you talking about? If anyone did the seducing, it was me. I was the one who pushed, Duncan. Do you seriously think that I could have responded to you like that if I hadn't have loved you. Jesus, my father would have killed me if he'd ever found out. As it was, everything he taught me was still inside me. I had to listen to his voice every time we kissed, touched or made love. I would never have fallen in love with a man if I could have helped. But you know what? There's no way I couldn't have. Duncan, you are the most honorable, beautiful man I've ever seen, both inside and out. I didn't even know if you'd ever had a male lover when I became assigned as your Watcher. I did enough research to find out when I realized what I was feeling. It shocked me that I felt desire for a man. I'd never been attracted to men. None whatsoever. It was only because of your reputation of reacting honorably to someone making a pass at you that I took a chance at all. I knew that you wouldn't hurt me if I did. Otherwise, there would have been no way I could handle the rejection."

"I know that he's apparently the only male lover you'd ever had. It didn't help that it was obviously the same type of relationship you had with Amanda. I didn't want that. If I was going to go against everything I'd been taught, then it was going to be for love and not the casual affection you get from others as they come and go. For one, I wanted commitment. I needed that badly. Two, I don't have forever to develop a relationship like you. So, you can bet when I seduced you, and I did seduce you, Duncan, I'd have gone all out to win you. Which I did."

"Well, Jim, I didn't know that. All I knew was that the man I loved, had loved for three years, suddenly disappears. I couldn't have helped but thought otherwise. You left me, I didn't leave you! And you know what? I was going to tell you the truth when you graduated. I wanted there to be no reason you couldn't move with me if you had to. As it was, you were too young and had too many close ties to Cascade. I know you had a fallout with your brother and your dad but you had a lot of close friends that would miss you and who you needed. I wasn't about to force anything on you. I wanted you the way you were. But I also can't stay in one place that long, not without someone finding out the truth. My life will always be a series of constant moves. Changing addresses as easy as changing cars. The only thing that I've been able to keep for my own, has been my name. And I'm fortunate I can do that. But that still doesn't stop others from challenging me or using the people I love and care about to get to me. I had reason to be cautious. Anyway, all I know is that after a while, the hatred turned to pain. It got better a couple of years later when I met Tessa, but that still didn't change the way I felt. I just had to deal with it. I promised myself I'd never come to Cascade ever again, because it hurt too much to face those memories. But you can see where that got me!"

"Of course I know him. I know all the people in Cascade who either have connections to Watchers or Immortals. Besides that, he's a detective in Major Crimes, same as I am. He's a good friend as well. So that's why we couldn't find him to tell him about his father. We hunted for him and since he was on vacation, we just assumed he was out of touch. He wasn't due back until tomorrow."

Jim hesitated answering. It told the listeners in the van who knew him well that what he said would probably be something terrifying. They knew Jim well enough to know that he kept everything that hurt him to himself. As Blair waited for the answer as well, he braced himself to find out the truth. He had a feeling that it may be the reason that Jim couldn't love him. If something happened to him while he was with Duncan, then he would have nothing to do with another male relationship. Sweat was pouring down his arms and his heart was racing a mile a minute.

It did surprise Blair that Jim didn't know he was there. Jim always knew if he was in the immediate area. Most likely it was because he was his Guide, but he wasn't for certain. It could be that they lived together and were best friends. He was sure that Jim knew his heartbeat by heart. It told him an awful lot that Jim wasn't using his senses to monitor his environment. He probably could barely keep himself under control, let alone his senses. Straining their ears to listen, after a long pause which seemed as if Jim was trying to form the words in a way that Duncan would understand, he said when he was ready, "I was raped."

"You heard me, Duncan. It was hard enough saying it once, let alone say it again." Jim's voice was trembling. It was as if the experience was so fresh in his mind that it seemed as if it was happening again. Jim finally fell down in the chair, head down as if he was ashamed to have had to tell him that. Duncan had known many women who'd been raped and he knew it took a brave one to be able to go on with their life. He couldn't blame Jim now for disappearing. A relationship with a man was probably the last thing he could have handled.

Duncan was silent. If rape had been the last thing he'd immagined, evidently he was wrong. He couldn't conceive of this situation. The shock of it had him halted in his tracks. He'd always known that he could jeopardize any relationship he had by the fact the he was immortal, but he would have expected an immortal to kill a man he was in love with, not rape them. Although, as his mind seethed with the implications, he could see where there would be nothing worse to get him to lose control and challenge someone. He was so furious by now that he could barely grit out of his teeth, "An immortal?"

Anger such as he'd never felt before burst through his mind and body. If Kalas had been there in front of him, he'd have killed him a thousand times, tortured him a thousand years for what he did. Duncan had already experience so much hurt, so much loss because of Kalas, that this was just one more thing to make him hate himself for being what he was. AN IMMORTAL! "WHAT?! You mean that sonofabitch raped you?"

"Kalas did it to try to get to you. He knew we were close, although he didn't know we were lovers. He wanted you to be angry enough to challenge him. If I'd have said anything, you'd have gone off half-cocked, barely able to contain yourself. You'd have lost in a heartbeat. I knew that you would not be able to win when pride and hatred overcomes your emotions."

"Yes I do. Duncan, Kalas was your equal or better in nearly everything. I know you killed him, but I also know you barely survived it. It was more a matter of who's better at the time than who's better all the time. You would have gone off, having lost your temper and soon after, your head. I also knew that if I came back, having been raped, I would have told you everything. Duncan, I may have been young and hurt in the one way that nearly destroyed me, but there was no way on earth that I would let myself be the reason for your death. I could leave you much easier than I could send you off to get yourself killed. I knew that sooner or later you'd take his head. But, that was the worst circumstance to challenge him with. He wanted you to challenge him. He did it, so you'd be vulnerable. Then, he could have easily taken your head. I loved you, Duncan. I could face your immortality, I could face the fact that long after I was dead, you'd still be living, I could accept knowing that you'd get over me and love someone else. You're one of the most generous, loving people this world has ever known so I knew that you would be able to love again. But, I wasn't going to be the cause of your precious life being destroyed. Women are raped all the time, and they have to deal with it, often knowing that justice would never be served. You think I could do any less?" A pause, and "You think that I could love you any less?"

"NO!! Duncan, haven't you been listening to me? I never blamed you for any of it. I loved you with all of my heart and I wanted to spend my life with you. I could never change that. You came to only obvious solution that the appearance of my disappearing gave you. Do you think that if I'd ever came to you later that you wouldn't have believed me? As hurt as you were, you loved me, and you'd give me the benefit of the doubt without question. Like you're doing now. That's the kind of man you are, Duncan."

The living play unfolded before the listeners. It had them riveted. As they heard Jim and Duncan talking, they were in shock and confusion about the whole situation. Part of the problem was that they didn't understand many of the things that they were referring too. Blair had learned some of it before hand off of Jim's computer but this referring to immortals had him stuck. It also didn't help that he, Simon and Brown were still reeling from learning about Jim being raped. Blair was hardly able to contain himself. He knew why Jim had never been able to love him. The explanation didn't help. He admired Jim for being able to handle a catastrophe like that, but he couldn't help but be hurt when all his dreams and hopes, everything that got him through the day, was being destroyed. Worst of all..he didn't know how to help Jim. Some Guide he was.

He knew about the Watchers from reading the computer files, but he didn't know what kind of organization it was. And what were these immortals. Was Duncan one? Did he even have a chance to win Jim's love? Would he have to live his whole life looking at other people's happiness and never finding it himself? All these questions and more ran through his mind as he listened to them.

Jim looked up from the floor which he was staring at to gaze into Duncan's eyes. He saw what was in his eyes and the next thing Duncan knew, he had a handful of large, very masculine man in his arms. Hugging for a few moments, they sat still, absorbing the comfort they found in each other's arms. Finally, Jim pulled away from him and again looked into his eyes.

A few moments later, Jim slowly bent his head to him. Capturing his lips, Jim kissed with all the pain, hurt and all the love that he was feeling. Slowly, Duncan opened his mouth, letting Jim lead. After the violence that had been done on him, he knew that Jim would need to feel control. He was aware of that much. Gradually, the kiss became harder, more passionate. In a matter of seconds, the kiss went from a tentative foray of exploration to passionate union of souls and the past.

Duncan needing to feel Jim, tugged his shirt out of his jeans. With the kiss occupying his mind, he couldn't get the buttons unopened. Finally, aggravated with the whole thing, he grabbed the shirt and ripped it open with one tear. Jim already had his shirt unbuttoned and falling off his arms. Jim's hands were exploring him, teasing the nipples that were so hard one touch had him arching in ecstasy.

Groaning with need, he reached down and felt the hardness of Jim's masculinity. Pulling open his jeans, he took hold of the rigid staff that it had been so long since he'd had. Breaking the kiss, his lips traveled down Jim's chest, taking the time to suckle each nipple. Jim groaned with need. Head back, he was a sight to behold. Hard body, gorgeous muscles delineated on his arms and chest, smooth, hairless skin, nipples firm little nubs, pubic hair outlining the stiff, slender long manhood saluting him. That was all it took.

Getting up off of the couch, he stood up and pulled Jim with him. Kissing again, they moved step by step, discarding each other's clothes, trying to touch every part of the other's body, to the bedroom. Memories of the past didn't stop them as they fell in bed. Duncan landed on Jim's virile body. Pushing up with his hands he gazed that the sultry sight under him. Jim looked at him with this sexy smile in his eyes and mouth that he'd perfected in the three years he'd known him. That was all it took.

His silent answer was to engulf Jim's cock in his mouth. It had been so long. Moving up and down, in a rhythmic motion, he timed his movements to Jim's. Whenever Jim thrust up, he pulled back. Whenever he retreated, he took all of it. This back and forth dance of desire had them caught of in the heaven of sexual climax. Finally, Jim could no longer hold back, and with a cry of "Duncan!" climaxed with explosive come. Swallowing the body of the man he'd loved so long ago, he tasted the man who'd he'd obsessed about for so many years. There was nothing like the taste of Jim's semen. That was even the one thing he'd never shared with Fitz. He could never do that with him. For some reason, he'd always felt as if it would have taken away his masculinity. He never had a problem with Jim. Giving Jim a blow job had come so naturally over their relationship that it had amazed him at how his development of their sexual experience flowed like a smooth river, with no turbulence.

In shock, Duncan was astonished at the courage it took for Jim to admit that he wanted him inside of him. Gathering himself together, he nodded and gently turned him over. Reaching into the dresser, he assumed that the oil that they'd both been fond of was still there having moved in a hurry and knowing that they'd kept plenty well sealed. Sure enough, he found it, and had it opened and in his hand before they could say anything further. Coating his hands, he moved to Jim and sliding his hand down his crack, slowly slid one finger inside. Stiffening, Jim took a moment to suppress his emotions from the past violence done to him. Exquisitely moving the finger in and out, Duncan massaged the internal walls of his anus. Stretching him gradually, it wasn't long before Jim had forgotten the pain of his rape in his desire to have more inside him. Inserting two, he scissored his fingers, making sure that Jim wanted it before he entered a third. Starting to feel uncomfortable with the fullness inside him, Jim paused a minute to let himself get used to the feeling, so there would be no pain. Finally, Jim started to violently push back against his finger, telling Duncan that he was more than ready.

Covering himself with more of the oil, Duncan positioned himself behind Jim and slowly started to enter him. Taking it one step at a time, he pushed inside. He was finally inside! He stayed there without moving until Jim was used to feel of him. When it was no longer an uncomfortable feeling, Duncan started moving in the timeless act of making love. In a quick movement, Jim slammed back. Shocked, until he realized what Jim was conveying with his body, he was frozen. Then, he started thrusting, moving in time to Jim's pushing against him. Slowly at first, then faster, they became absorbed in the feeling of passion between them. At last, Duncan was ramming Jim with the strength of his body, and Jim answered with every thrust against him. Neither had the control they should have with their age. They needed each other too desperately. In a matter of moments, they both exploded, almost in time together. Letting the after shocks hit them, they collapsed on the bed. Pulling out, Duncan took Jim in his arms and didn't let go.

Firmly within his arms, Duncan waited for the peace of after sex to settle in. Neither could speak a word until they were completely at ease. Duncan couldn't believe the emotions running through his mind. He'd always loved Jim, but somehow, this was a goodbye. He didn't know how he knew, but he did. This was a fraction of time that had been given to them for healing. After the pain and suffering they'd both been through, they needed it.

Blair and the others listened to the sound of Jim demanding Duncan inside him, his cries as he was evidently entered and their climax. That was just the beginning. During the rest of the night, they made love more than once. Maybe because their separation had been so long, the feelings between the two were evident even to those who listened. For Blair, it was a time of hell. He couldn't move, he couldn't breath, all he could do was listen to Jim make love to another man instead of him. The only thing he wanted, the only thing he needed was Jim. God, it felt like he was losing his life. Never had Blair felt hatred, envy and this severe depression of unrequited love. Even his relationship with Mara hadn't been this bad. But that was because Mara hadn't been his true love, his soulmate. Jim was.

Inside, his soul started to crumble, unraveling in threads of nothing but the basic material he was made of. The only thing that could have put him back together was Jim's love and from the way things appeared, it didn't look like he'd ever have that. He wanted to scream. He wanted to shout. He wanted to do all those things people did when they threw a tantrum. He was lost inside himself and he needed his Sentinel. It was as simple as that.

It continued until early morning. Blair was holding on by a slim thread. One pull and he was about to lose it. Hearing Jim doing with Duncan what he wanted to do with him was fueling his jealousy. As much as he loved Jim, at that moment, he hated Duncan with everything inside him. He was almost to the point of storming up to the house, demanding that Jim return to him. That Jim was his and not Duncan's.

But he didn't do any of that. He couldn't. After Jim's past experience, he would have been some Guide to destroy Jim like that. Instead, he destroyed himself, as he listened to the sounds of the betrayal of his heart. Brown and Simon, knowing how Blair felt, could only comfort him, by silently giving him occasional hugs, telling him that Jim wasn't going to give up everything for this man. But Blair didn't know that. He couldn't be sure of anything or trust anything at that time. When the sounds of passion tapered off, they once more heard coherent conversation.

"She was beautiful. In four hundred years I've truly been in love only three times. I had her in my life for nearly twelve years, and during that time, I felt nothing but joy. Pain took a back burner to her. She was an artist filled with life that came out in her sculptures. I never could understand how a woman as beautiful as her got familiar enough to learn to weld enough so that she could create her metal vision. The only thing that I sincerely regretted about my life with her, was the fact that I couldn't have given her children. She'd have made a wonderful parent."

"So would you, Duncan. I always hated the fact that you couldn't help missing out on the things that make the life we live a little bit better. You would have been great with kids. That was something that I had to accept when I committed to you in my heart. The fact that there would never be children. I knew there wouldn't have been even adopted children. You wouldn't have let yourself or any children be placed in the position of being used against you. That's a reality you face everyday. But, I do have to admit that for a time, I hated her. I hated her even though I never knew her, for having you when I couldn't."

"Duncan, I've never been attracted to males. It still surprises me to this day that I wanted you that bad. I'm not gay, and I barely fit the term bisexual since there have been only two males in my life that I've ever wanted. I've often wondered if I needed you to show me that love between two males could happen. I never imagined that two men could love at all, let alone that it could happen to me. It's just possible, it was the same way with you."

"You may be right. I know that I've always been afraid of love. I'm scared of being vulnerable. I'm scared of losing someone I care for that much. I get so tired of losing that it's hard to take a chance. I don't know right this moment, though. I just know that I've only experienced three other times where the hurt was as bad as that." Then, it occurred to him what Jim had said previously, "You said two males?"

The minute Blair heard that, it was all he could do not jump up and down. He hoped....he hoped that Jim was talking about what he thought he was talking about. It would kill him, if it wasn't so. After needing Jim for so long, if Jim was in love with someone else, he wouldn't survive. He didn't have the necessary ability to live without his other half. And also, just what did Duncan mean when he said four hundred years. His intelligent mind made the obvious associated from the references to immortals and four hundred years. His brain was telling him that it wasn't possible and yet it was also telling him that there was no denying it. He listened for more, to find out the course of his future and to find out the truth. From his point of view, they evidently were the same thing.

Lying on Duncan's chest, Jim rubbed his hand up and down his body, trying to get out of admitting the truth. He was as bad as Duncan was. Telling someone what you feel, the emotions that are within you, didn't come easy. Seeing himself in Jim, Duncan didn't force or pressure him anymore. "Duncan, there are things you don't know about me. Things I could never tell anyone. I really didn't know what was going on then, when I first met you, but I do now. You're not the only one who's a living myth."

Blair, listening, held his breath, waiting for the answer. It astonished him and yet it didn't that Jim would confide the truth in this man. If what he suspected was true than it was only natural that Jim could trust Duncan with his secret. If anyone would understand, it would be Duncan. To his surprise, Duncan asked, "Are you referring to the tribal warrior scouts, as stated and described in Burton's works?"

"Burton had this hatred of same sex relationships. To survive, Sentinels had to form a partnership with another person. The ones he saw were always of the same sex, but there could have been others who weren't. Anyway, the companions, if I remember right, were called Guides. Essentially, they were shamans who had the ability to not only seek guidance from the spirit world but had what Burton called the Voice."

"At least that's what he called it. It's the ability to compel a person with the sound of their voice. Normally, these Guides would only use it to control the Sentinel's zone-out factor, which is when one or more senses are so over focused that he or she loses track of their environment. When that happened, they were completely vulnerable to attack. The Guide would protect the Sentinel at that time, while at all other times, it is the Sentinel who protects the Guide. The logic of it goes, that the Sentinel protects the tribe, while the Guide protects the Sentinel, cushioning him and providing his Sentinel with a tie to the physical world when he's lost in his senses. The Sentinel does the same thing, by providing a tie to the physical when the Guide must visit the spirits. As for the Voice, a shaman with that gift is born with it. When they're fully trained, a Guide or a shaman with the gift who's unpartnered is able to compel a person with their voice alone. It can be used for evil as well as good."

"No, that's not what I mean at all. Jim, all I'm saying is that the Voice can be used for evil as well as good, by taking away the free will of others, forcing them to do things they would normally not do. But as far as Guides go, because they're partnered, the Sentinel's desire to protect no matter what the cost to them causes the Guide, who's bonded and wouldn't leave even if they could a reason for doing good. Because they have to balance each other out usually, a Sentinel/Guide pair works to protect and not destroy. It's only when either the Sentinel or a potential Guide is alone and unbonded that evil is possible."

When they heard that, Simon and Blair couldn't believe the concise and precise answer Duncan Macleod gave. Both of them were familiar with Sentinel and Guides to know that everything Duncan said was probably true. Blair had already come to those conclusions anyway. Brown, who knew nothing of Jim's gifts but what he'd just learned that day, didn't know what was going on. When Brown asked Blair, "Do you know....?" Blair quickly reached over and put a hand to his mouth. "Shut up, Brown, I've got to listen to this." With Simon's "Blair's right. Stay quiet and I'm sure you'll get an explanation later when it's convenient." Brown hushed up.

Jim nodded. Duncan tried to assimilate that fact. It explained a lot of things, especially the feeling that this was going to be their last time. It wasn't just because of losing Methos. It was because of this. He finally said, "Then that explains what you meant by our experience being necessary to learn how to love in a same sex relationship. Are you lovers?"

As Blair listened to Jim say he loved him, he became ecstatic. All this time, worrying he'd done something wrong to deserve a love that had no chance for reciprocation and it was right before his eyes if he'd just looked. All those clues that Jim threw his way, all the looks, all the touches suddenly had meaning. He recognized the fact that Jim loved him and had for a good long time. He'd always been afraid he was just seeing what he wanted to see because he was scared that Jim would kick him out of his life. It made him furious about all the time they'd denied their feelings. They could have been together long before now and not suffered through the hell that suppressing their feelings did to them.

Duncan pulled away from Jim to move throughout the room. Duncan started pacing the bedroom, trying to face his own truth and tell it to Jim. Jim deserved no less the full unvarnished truth. And for once, he didn't care that it wasn't his secret to tell. He needed to talk with someone, and Jim above all people, knew what having a deadly secret can do to you. He'd never reveal anything. From what he knew of Jim's personality, Jim would sooner go to the grave than tell someone his secrets. A few minutes later, Duncan said, "Jim, if I tell you this, you've got to promise me that you'll never reveal it to another soul."

"Duncan, you know full well I can keep secrets. Besides the fact that I still love you, even though it's not what I feel for my Guide, you know about me too. All it would take is to tell it to the newspapers and the Government would have me in their laboratories in a heartbeat. I'll tell you something else. I never was entirely factual with your chronicles. When we were together, I never reported our relationship to headquarters."

Duncan was speechless for moments until, "Five years ago I met someone. Someone who changed the fabric of who I am. All my life I've always known I was Duncan Macleod of the Clan Macleod and always saw the world in black and white. I mean, if you were evil, you were evil. If you were good, then you were good. I never saw the varying shades of gray. It's a wonder I was never killed. A habit of mine is to leap before I look. But I never saw what I was doing until I met this very special person. A very special immortal."

Unspoken thoughts were racing through Blair, Simon, and Brown. It was finally occurring to them, what Duncan and Jim had been talking about all this time. Blair had suspected and pieced it all together, but hearing the truth spoken out loud as a statement of fact blew his mind away. It was all he could do not to assimilate what having people who didn't age and couldn't be killed unless...(by beheading?) would do to the history of the world. He could see where an organization would come about to monitor these people. His anthropological mind grasped all the facts and started examining them at a hyperactive rate. He could tell though, that Simon and Brown were having trouble believing it. Blair had already faced much that couldn't be explained in his life, so it was no trouble for him to believe. But they thought Duncan was insane. He could tell it by the shocked look of disbelief on their faces. They hadn't recognized the truth when Duncan referred to his four hundred years, or when he and Jim talked about immortals, aliens, and some secret organization called the Watchers. But it was obvious to him now that Duncan must be four centuries old and evidently, from what he'd just said, in love with another very old immortal named Methos. That still didn't mean Blair wasn't stunned.

He'd known about many lost legends referring to an ancient race that never died. If he remembered his legends right, then the only way that these creatures could be killed was by beheading. Quickly, all the associations needed to correlate the facts came together. He realized that those legends must not be legends at all. Simon and Brown were having trouble. They just couldn't believe what was being said. But, neither had ever faced the truly impossible before. He didn't doubt that they would come to believe but it would take some time for them to recognize the truth.

"I think anyone with half a mind would have, but, anyway, we separated. When I went back to my barge, Methos was challenged by Kalas. He was losing. He hadn't practiced in a long time, so he killed himself by throwing himself into the water. He floated downstream until he came near my barge. When he got there, the first thing he did was challenge him. It didn't take long to realize that he was deliberately trying to lose. When I confronted him on it, he told me flat out that he wanted me to take his head. He told me that he didn't have the passion to fight anymore. But with his quickening and my life, we could defeat Kalas. It was at that point something really and truly changed between us. How often do you expect the oldest living man to just give up like that and offer his head? Any other immortal would have taken it in a heartbeat, but I couldn't. If he'd have died than the world would a lose a very great man."

Chuckling, Duncan replied, "No, not really. He is wise in experience. He knows more about human nature than anyone I know, but as for true wisdom? He has it, but he's had to learn it the hard way, over time. He told me once that wisdom has to be experienced then learned because it can't be taught except by time itself. That's true. But for all that, he isn't perfect. He's made more mistakes than you could even imagine and still does. His past is filled with things no one in their right mind wants to know."

"I know, it's hard to imagine. But it's true. Anyway, his brothers were still alive and one of them, Kronos, wanted to form up the brotherhood again. Methos couldn't kill his brothers, even though they were evil, so he manipulated me into doing it. I killed Kronos and Caspian and he killed Silas. We killed Kronos and Silas at the same time. When that happened, a double quickening occurred. Jim, it was so weird. For a moment, we were sharing souls. I experienced everything he was. It was gone soon after though. The only thing is that now I'm able to tell if he's alive and well. I know when he takes a quickening. And I know that he feels the same thing. He made me face everything he'd done, how many people he'd killed, and then he made me face the fact that he didn't deserve to die, when Cassandra was going to kill him for enslaving and raping her three thousand years ago, I couldn't let her kill him. I couldn't have admitted at that time, but if she'd have taken his head, she wouldn't have lived beyond the second his quickening had settled. I'd have killed her. As for Methos? He's changed. He admits that if you can't change, be able to accept your mistakes, and get on with your life, than you won't survive as an immortal. And he's right."

"Yes, but I don't have a chance. My damn habit of judging people, including myself, destroyed whatever chance we had. And somehow, I know that if we'd been lovers, we'd still be together. I've always been loyal to those I love. The only damn thing is that I didn't know I loved him. Unfortunately, I pushed him away when I really did need him, not recognizing my love for him, and now, when I do know, I can't tell him that I love him, that he's the one person who is the other half of my soul."

"Jim, do you know how easy it is for a five thousand year old man to hide when he wants to? When he doesn't want to be found, then you won't find him. He's a master of making himself belong. I don't know how many times he crashed on my couch or bed. He helps himself to whatever he wants, most especially beer. There's no keeping that around him. It's like he has an bottomless stomach he pours it in. It just keeps coming. He throws the bottlecaps behind the fridge, he breaks into my apartment worse than Amanda does, he makes fun of me, he's one of the best friends I've ever had..." By that time, he was sobbing. Comforting words were crooned to him by Jim. Jim held him until his crying had stopped. Jim didn't make fun of him as he sobbed the story of his relationship with Methos to him.

Time passed and they settled down again. Jim then said, "Duncan, if you want to find him, you will. What I'd do is do the same thing you recommended to me. Seduce him. I doubt he's immune to you. All immortals at least try bisexuality after their first century. And with his age, I'd bet he's learned that love is where you find it. Make up and push him into a relationship. If he says he's too old for commitment, especially an immortal, than change his mind."

"Don't whine, Duncan, it doesn't become you. As for your end of the deal, you have eternity, as long as you keep your head, me, I only have this lifetime to do it. And besides, I have a feeling if Methos means that much to you, than you mean that much to him. I doubt he would be able to keep himself from knowing what's going on with you in your life. It probably won't take you very long to find him if you apply yourself."

"It doesn't make my life any easier, that's for sure. Coming up with an explanation to tell my captain, is going to take some quick thinking. That also means coming up with what to tell Blair. I don't feel I have the right to tell him about immortality. That is a secret that only those who are involved should know. But I'll deal with it. I should be able to invent some explanation."

Hearing that Brown was serious about burying a body, for a moment made Simon start to lecture, but as soon as he opened his mouth, he realized that nothing Brown said was any different than the way he felt. He owed Jim his life and for once, if it meant keeping from the public knowledge that wouldn't do them any good anyway to protect Jim and Blair, he'd do it. He could, at last make up the large debt he owed Jim and Blair for saving his life. But, seeing the smug look on Brown's face, as if he'd just thought of something hilarious, hesitantly Simon asked, afraid of the answer, "What do you have in mind?"

"Well, since Jim and Blair are obviously head over heals in love with each other, what better way to get them to stop talking about headless bodies than to provide an even more juicier thing to talk about. Hey Hairboy, how about you and Ellison smacking a big kiss on each other in front of the department?" He looked straight at Blair as he said it, hardly able to contain his hilarity.

They were laughing at him. He was used to them teasing him from everything from the way he dressed, to following Jim around like they were joined to the hip, but he wasn't used to facing his emotions for Jim. He'd been through hell, and now it looked like he had a chance at heaven. He didn't like them teasing him about his love for Jim, but suddenly, he saw the humor in the whole thing and starting laughing. It also helped that he'd come up with a way to return the favor by publicly humiliating Simon and Brown. "Guys, you're probably right. The only thing I'd really love to see is what Jim has in mind when he tries to seduce me."

That set them off again. They started throwing flowers, massage oil, candy, thick clothing, ancient esoteric texts, serenading, anything and everything they could come up with that Jim might think of to seduce him. Then Simon dramatically said, "Blair you could always use those things to seduce him. After all, the last thing he'd be expecting is for you to tantalize and tease him unmercifully. I don't have the slightest doubt that you'd give him a heart attack before you're through."

Hilarity broke out again. They continued laughing in that irreverent mood, until the seriousness of the situation set in. Simon declared, "If we all agree to it, than that's what we'll do. The best thing for all of us is to see if we could maybe find a way to pin the murders on the this Hampton. After all, he's the one who killed them. It seems to me, Duncan was only protecting his life when he killed the one we found at the mill."

As Simon and Brown fell asleep, Blair was contemplating all he'd heard that night. He'd always thought he'd never be able to have Jim. Now it looked as if every dream he'd ever had wanting a love that was his, was coming true. Looking out the window, he reflected, wondered what their life will be like twenty years from now. He knew Jim could easily be killed on the job. So could he for that matter, but that wouldn't stop him from taking a chance on love. It looked like the best thing he could do for now, was to imagine ways to drive his sentinel beyond control. He laughed at the idea of using a feather on someone who's touch was 1000 times more sensitive than his. Throughout the rest of the night, he planned the rest of his life, with Jim. He couldn't have been happier.

The next morning, Duncan woke up. A feeling of happiness he hadn't experienced in over a year was surrounding him. Feeling a hard body lying against him, he turned to look at the man he'd loved years ago. Reaching up, he lightly kissed Jim. In minute, Jim was devouring his mouth. They were starting to make love again, when the phone rang. Groaning, Jim tried to get him to ignore the phone. Duncan gave him a quick, hard, passionate kiss, said, "Hold that thought, Jim. I need to answer it. It might be Hampton."

Duncan started cussing fluently in the languages he knew. He was tired of dealing with everything by himself. For once, he wished he had Methos' help. He really needed him now. Seeing that Duncan was lost in anger and recognizing the sense of hopelessness he had, Jim got up and walked over to the phone to hug him. "Duncan, you're not alone. You have me. I may not be immortal, but I am a Sentinel."

They were soon back in bed, touching each other, teasing each other using all the nooks and crannies that were sensitive to. They'd been lovers for nearly three years. Neither had forgotten how the other felt, what it took to arouse the other. It didn't take them long to build up to a point where Jim wanted Duncan inside him so bad, he was begging for it. The feel of his cock sliding in and out of his old lover caused Duncan to be insensible with passion. Thrusting hard and fast, he quickly brought them to climax. Jim's come erupted all their chests in between them. The feel of his come inside Jim, had Jim groaning with ecstasy.

"I see you are ready. Well, let's do it!" With that the battle was on. Hampton pressed his advantage and at the beginning had the best moves. But since Duncan had relaxed and let Jim help him through his anger, he was more calm. Instead of the red-hot anger that filled him earlier, his emotions were engraved in cold, hard ice. Nothing Hampton said while they fought could penetrate that ice. Not long after, Duncan started to beat him. Within moments, Hampton had been forced to the ground with a cold, sword at his neck. Looking up, he demanded, "Finish it, Highlander!" In his eyes was resignation. And a glimmer of gratitude. Surprised, he almost let go, but remembering all the pain he'd suffered, the death of his friends, the senseless death of Hampton's student, the anger returned, and crying, "There can be only one!" chopped his head off.

As the quickening hit, he saw Jim. To his surprise, he was accompanied by Captain Banks, Detective Brown, and the short man who'd been accompanying Jim as he'd come into the precinct. Held up between them, a golden, brown man stood there. Supported by his friends, Duncan recognized his nephew. All of this occurred in a fraction amount of time. Then he saw no more, except at the last, when Jim and Rafe were holding each other up.

The quickening was powerful. Feeling the pleasure and pain of millions of volts of living energy spreading throughout his body, he had his sword held up, as it was all directed into him. When it was all over, tears pouring down his face, he was pulled into Jim's hug. Needing the strong arms around him, he accepted it for a few minutes. Then, pulling back, he looked at the others.

But the last man was the one that captured his gaze. Shoulder length hair framed a gorgeous, heart shaped face. Short, compact body, he was stocky and carried an obvious athletic build. But then he looked into his eyes. What he saw there wasn't astonishment. Instead, there was pain, absolute joy, need, and a definite desire that was hungry for knowledge. Knowing instinctively that this was Jim's Guide, Blair, he turned back to Jim.